“A kiss is a lovely trick, designed by nature, to stop words when speech becomes superfluous.” — Ingrid Bergman

This is a lovely sentiment, because when we kiss the one we love it is purely to express our undying love for them, something that words can never seem to adequately express.

“Love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies.” — Aristotle

This is an old quote, but a good one. Two people in love are connected so completely that it’s as if they have one soul. They feel each other’s pain and delight in each other’s achievements.

“I wished for nothing beyond her smile, and to walk with her thus, hand in hand, along a sun-warmed, flower-bordered path.” — Andre Gide

When we’re in love, the only thing we need is the one we’re in love with to be completely happy. This is such a true sentiment of love. Those who are deeply in love will be happy anywhere, each other is the only thing they truly need.

“Sometimes your nearness takes my breath away; and all the things I want to say can find no voice. Then, in silence, I can only hope my eyes will speak my heart.” — Robert Sexton

Expressing our love can be difficult with words and sometimes our eyes really are the only thing that can truly express how we feel. It’s important that we remember never to underestimate the power of our eyes.

“If I could reach up and hold a star for every time you made me smile, I would have the whole night sky in the palm of my hand.” — Unknown

Smiling together is such an important part of any relationship. The best relationships are ones where the smiles are numerous. We should not only love our partner, but enjoy their company in the deepest way of all the people in our life.

“The life and love we create is the life and love we live.”
– Leo Buscaglia

This is an important sentiment. If we don’t give our love fully, than we won’t receive it back. We must take a chance on love for the opportunity to be loved. This can be a scary risk, but one that we’ll receive many rewards for pursuing.

“Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, While loving someone deeply gives you courage.”
– Lao Tzu

Those who love us raise us up and make us feel strong, but because love can be so deeply scary, giving our love gives us the most courage. We must be brave in order to gain strength and with the one we love, we can find both.

“Love cannot endure indifference. It needs to be wanted. Like a lamp, it needs to be fed out of the oil of another’s heart, or its flame burns low.”
– Henry Ward Beecher

It’s impossible to maintain love for someone who doesn’t love you back, but two people who love each other can keep that flame burning for a lifetime.

“For every beauty there is an eye somewhere to see it. For every truth there is an ear somewhere to hear it. For every love there is a heart somewhere to receive it.”
– Ivan Panin

This is a lovely sentiment, especially for those who are yet to find the love of their life. Somewhere out there is someone who will love each and everyone of us in a way that was just meant to be. Sometimes we can lose hope that we’ll ever find our soul mate, this quote reminds us to never give up.

“The most wasted day is that in which we have not laughed.” — Chamfort

Laughter is important in romantic relationships because it relieves stress and makes us feel close to our partners. A day where there’s no laughter is a waste. We should strive to fill each day with time together to laugh and enjoy our partner’s company.

“We come to love not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly.” — Sam Keen

This is an important lessen for those of us who are sometimes picky when choosing a mate. There is no such thing as a perfect person and we will never find one. Instead, we must learn to love the imperfections in the people around us.

“I believe that two people are connected at the heart, and it doesn’t matter what you do, or who you are or where you live; there are no boundaries or barriers if two people are destined to be together.” — Julia Roberts

This is a beautiful sentiment from a beautiful actress. Family values, cultures, friends, and a number of other factors can convince a couple that their love was not meant to be, but there is nothing that should prevent us from pursuing love.

“Love doesn’t make the world go ’round. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile.” — Franklin P. Jones

There is little enjoyment in a life that isn’t shared. Love isn’t what motivates us to live, but what makes our lives valuable and enjoyable. A life with no love is not nearly as wonderful as one that is full of it.

“I love you, not only for what you are, But for what I am when I am with you.” — Roy Croft

This is an important part of any romantic relationship. Our partner in life should bring out the best in us. They should make us grow as humans and help us meet our greatest potential. It’s important that we love who we are when we are with the one we love.

“Love is but the discovery of ourselves in others, and the delight in the recognition.” — Alexander Smith

Finding someone who is similar to ourselves is a wonderful experience. Everyone wants to find someone who is similar to themselves and this discovery can leave to a wonderful and rich relationship.

“In love there are two things: bodies and words.” — Joyce Carol Oates

There is great value in the things we say and the things we do. Body language is extremely important in loving relationships. Sometimes the gentlest touch can say far more than words, but everyone loves to hear beautiful love-filled words as well.

“It’s so easy, To think about Love, To Talk about Love, To wish for Love, But it’s not always easy, To recognize Love, Even when we hold it…. In our hands.” — Jaka

Sometimes love is right in front of us and we can’t see it. This can happen to the very best of us. Love can be a challenging thing to recognize, we must always keep our eyes and heart wide open in order to find it.

This post was originally published, in a somewhat different form, on Funny Quotes about Life, in 2009.

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3. Sayings about Life

The universe is a big place, perhaps the biggest.

The year was 2081, and everyone was finally equal.

True terror is to wake up one morning and discover that your high school
class is running the country.

Here we are, trapped in the amber of the moment. There is no why.

I was taught that the human brain was the crowning glory of evolution so
far, but I think it’s a very poor scheme for survival.

People don’t come to church for preachments, of course, but to daydream
about God.

Kurt Vonnegut Quotes from Slaughterhouse Five

So it goes.

How nice–to feel nothing, and still get full credit for being alive.

Like so many Americans, she was trying to construct a life that made
sense from things she found in gift shops.

All time is all time. It does not change. It does not lend itself to
warnings or explanations. It simply is. Take it moment by moment, and you
will find that we are all, as I’ve said before, bugs in amber.

Kurt Vonnegut Quotes from Cat’s Cradle

Beware of the man who works hard to learn something, learns it, and finds
himself no wiser than before… He is full of murderous resentment of people
who are ignorant without having come by their ignorance the hard way.

Maturity is a bitter disappointment for which no remedy exists, unless
laughter can be said to remedy anything.

Peculiar travel suggestions are dancing lessons from God.

Tiger got to hunt, bird got to fly; Man got to sit and wonder, “Why, why,
why?” Tiger got to sleep, bird got to land; Man got to tell himself he
understand.

She was a fool, and so am I, and so is anyone who thinks he sees what God
is doing.

Kurt Vonnegut Quotes from A Man Without a Country

Humor is an almost physiological response to fear.

I urge you to please notice when you are happy, and exclaim or murmur or
think at some point, “If this isn’t nice, I don’t know what is.”

Here is a lesson in creative writing. First rule: Do not use semicolons.
They are transvestite hermaphrodites representing absolutely nothing. All
they do is show you’ve been to college.

I think that novels that leave out technology misrepresent life as badly
as Victorians misrepresented life by leaving out sex.

Kurt Vonnegut Quotes from Breakfast of Champions

1492. As children we were taught to memorize this year with pride and joy
as the year people began living full and imaginative lives on the continent
of North America. Actually, people had been living full and imaginative
lives on the continent of North America for hundreds of years before that.
1492 was simply the year sea pirates began to rob, cheat, and kill them.

The chief weapon of sea pirates, however, was their capacity to astonish.
Nobody else could believe, until it was too late, how heartless and greedy
they were.

Charm was a scheme for making strangers like and trust a person
immediately, no matter what the charmer had in mind.

I can have oodles of charm when I want to.

New knowledge is the most valuable commodity on earth. The more truth we
have to work with, the richer we become.

Kurt Vonnegut Quotes from Cold Turkey

One of the few good things about modern times: If you die horribly on
television, you will not have died in vain. You will have entertained us.

Thanks to TV and for the convenience of TV, you can only be one of two
kinds of human beings, either a liberal or a conservative.

There is a tragic flaw in our precious Constitution, and I don’t know
what can be done to fix it. This is it: Only nut cases want to be president.

Here’s what I think the truth is: We are all addicts of fossil fuels in a
state of denial, about to face cold turkey.

Kurt Vonnegut Quotes from God Bless You, Mr. Rosewater

There’s only one rule that I know of, babies—God damn it, you’ve got to
be kind.

Kurt Vonnegut Quotes from Slapstick

Since Alice had never received any religious instruction, and since she
had led a blameless life, she never thought of her awful luck as being
anything but accidents in a very busy place. Good for her.

Why don’t you take a flying fuck at a rolling doughnut? Why don’t you
take a flying fuck at the mooooooon?

Kurt Vonnegut Quotes from Deadeye Dick

That is my principal objection to life, I think: It’s too easy, when
alive, to make perfectly horrible mistakes.

Kurt Vonnegut Quotes from Hocus Pocus

Another flaw in the human character is that everybody wants to build and
nobody wants to do maintenance.

During my three years in Vietnam, I certainly heard plenty of last words
by dying American footsoldiers. Not one of them, however, had illusions that
he had somehow accomplished something worthwhile in the process of making
the Supreme Sacrifice.

Kurt Vonnegut Quotes from Mother Night

We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful what we pretend to
be.

There are plenty of good reasons for fighting, but no good reason ever to
hate without reservation, to imagine that God Almighty Himself hates with
you, too.

Kurt Vonnegut Quotes from Sirens of Titan

A purpose of human life, no matter who is controlling it, is to love
whoever is around to be loved.

Kurt Vonnegut Quotes from Timequake

All persons, living and dead, are purely coincidental.

Many people need desperately to receive this message: “I feel and think much
as you do, care about many of the things you care about, although most
people do not care about them. You are not alone.”

More Kurt Vonnegut Quotes

We could have saved the Earth but we were too damned cheap.

Those who believe in telekinetics, raise my hand.

It is a very mixed blessing to be brought back from the dead.

Well, the telling of jokes is an art of its own, and it always rises from
some emotional threat. The best jokes are dangerous, and dangerous because
they are in some way truthful.

I have been a soreheaded occupant of a file drawer labeled “science
fiction” ever since, and I would like out, particularly since so many
serious critics regularly mistake the drawer for a urinal.

Just because some of us can read and write and do a little math, that
doesn’t mean we deserve to conquer the Universe.

Literature should not disappear up its own asshole, so to speak.

About astrology and palmistry: they are good because they make people
vivid and full of possibilities. They are communism at its best. Everybody
has a birthday and almost everybody has a palm.

I really wonder what gives us the right to wreck this poor planet of
ours.

I tell you, we are here on Earth to fart around, and don’t let anybody
tell you different.

If people think nature is their friend, then they sure don’t need an
enemy.

People have to talk about something just to keep their voice boxes in
working order so they’ll have good voice boxes in case there’s ever anything
really meaningful to say.

The feeling about a soldier is, when all is said and done, he wasn’t
really going to do very much with his life anyway. The example usually is:
he wasn’t going to compose Beethoven’s Fifth.

What should young people do with their lives today? Many things,
obviously. But the most daring thing is to create stable communities in
which the terrible disease of loneliness can be cured.

Who is more to be pitied, a writer bound and gagged by policemen or one
living in perfect freedom who has nothing more to say?

Any reviewer who expresses rage and loathing for a novel is preposterous.
He or she is like a person who has put on full armor and attacked a hot
fudge sundae.

I want to stay as close to the edge as I can without going over. Out on
the edge you see all kinds of things you can’t see from the center.

If you can do a half-assed job of anything, you’re a one-eyed man in a
kingdom of the blind.

Laughter and tears are both responses to frustration and exhaustion. I
myself prefer to laugh, since there is less cleaning up to do afterward.

Life happens too fast for you ever to think about it. If you could just
persuade people of this, but they insist on amassing information.

Say what you will about the sweet miracle of unquestioning faith, I
consider a capacity for it terrifying and absolutely vile!

This post was originally published, in a somewhat different form, on Funny Quotes about Life, in 2009.

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Doing Things Your Way Pays Off In The Long Run

I’m not advocating being stubborn or bullish, but sticking to your guns about what you want from life is a must if you ever plan on being happy. Doing what others want you to do will help in the short term (promotions and raises), but if you want true success you have to play by your own rules.

I learned this funny life lesson after losing my job. After being laid off from my IT job, I was having an extremely hard time finding another job. My whole life I had done what other people had told me to do, and now I was paying the price for it. There was no plan for figuring out what to do on my own after there was no one to tell me what to do, and I couldn’t find a new master to serve. Spending a few months floundering can lead to some new lows in life, and the only thing it felt like I had left was my sense of humor. I started a website that was full of jokes about how rough unemployed life was, which turned out to be a hit and was getting a massive amount of traffic from all over the web. From there I gained the confidence to start moving again, drafting my own script for my life. Long story short, I never went back to IT and am never going to work in an office again. It’s my game, by my rules.

Making A Living Is Not The Same As Making A Life

When planning a future, either by yourself or with your significant other, your career plays a major part in your plans. People spend a lot of time working, or stressing and thinking about their jobs, and this frequently gets in the way of the life that was originally planned out. No one spends their youth dreaming about spending their lives in the office, yet most of us do. It took me getting out of one to realize this, and to be able to reflect upon it.

Your life is your friends, family, dreams, and aspirations, not budgets, deadlines, and quotas. Make time for your life, or making a living will prevent you from doing it.

We Can Say The Same Thing, But I Can Still Be Wrong

While my wife and I don’t argue very often, when we do it’s usually about things of little importance. The semantics of our conversation usually spark the argument, and both of us end up arguing the same point. I know that we can’t be the only couple that this happens to, so what I’ve learned is that it’s more important to concede than it is to push on for the sake of winning an argument.

Learning to step back and realize that there are fights worth fighting, and others that are better to lose can help keep the peace between you and your spouse.

Marriage Is Friendship First

I have a great marriage, but it didn’t end up like this because of good fortune. Taking time to make sure that your significant other is also your best friend makes every aspect of a marriage much easier. When you share the same view points, goals, and aspirations all decision making is incredibly easier.

The easiest way to judge your friendship is how you feel after a long period of time together, like after a vacation. We had spent a week on a road trip, and after the third day we were at each other’s throats. Once we made it back home (and started talking again) we realized that something had to be done to improve our situation. It took us about a year of sharing thoughts, feelings, and emotions with one another, as well as spending more time together to get us both to the point where we can be content spending the rest of our lives together.

Love Through Thick And Thin

I grew up with dogs in the house, but it wasn’t until a couple years ago that I finally started to understand them. While going through a rough patch at my old job and with my wife (see previous paragraph) I wasn’t spending the kind of time with the dogs that I should. There was a night where one of my dogs worked his way into the house while we were sleeping, and instead of rummaging through the garbage he came into bed and cuddled up right next to me and I let him sleep there with me the entire night. He didn’t care what I was going through, he loved me – no matter what.

Through hard times, those who you love are going to be there for you. Just remember to be receptive and reciprocate when the time is right.

The key to learning lessons throughout life is keep your eyes open and interpret any messages that might be coming at you. Everything around you is constantly sending you signals, from the dirty windows that want to be cleaned, to your wife not talking to you the same way that she used to. You have to figure out what meaning there is these messages and adjust your life to make the most of them. We aren’t on a predetermined path from the womb to the grave, you can go in any direction that you want and improve your life however you want to.

This post was originally published, in a somewhat different form, on Funny Quotes about Life, in 2009.

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“The man who has done his level best… is a success, even though the world may write him down a failure.” — B. C. Forbes

Everyone seems to be searching for success. Do your best, even if you fail. Sometimes it’s about your definition of what you have done, rather than what the world sees. Time may find you’re something else.

“Always bear in mind that your own resolution to succeed is more important than any other.” — Abraham Lincoln

Did you resolve to succeed today? Did you set your mind to procrastination instead? It isn’t easy to stick to what you want to do, but that kind of focus is what brings us closer to success.

“You were not born a winner, and you were not born a loser. You are what you make yourself be.” — Lou Holtz

He does mean ‘what you make yourself to be.’ It’s about choosing to be the person you dream about.

“We must be the change we wish to see in the world.” — Mahatma Gandhi

It isn’t enough to talk about the change that is needed. People talk all the time, but it is less common to make the changes discussed.

“Life has no limitations, except the ones you make.” — Les Brown

How have you limited yourself today? It’s in your power to change the mindset to make your limitations less a part of your daily routine. Belief in the limitations makes them far more real.

“No one is useless in this world who lightens the burden of it to anyone else.” — Charles Dickens

A lot of people feel the burden of the world. It isn’t easy to make someone else’s path easier, and the effort required brings good feelings to both the people involved.

“People rarely succeed unless they have fun in what they are doing.” — Dale Carnegie

Fun and work may seem to be opposites, but this success master has all the answers.

“You just can’t beat the person who never gives up.” — Babe Ruth

You can try, but it doesn’t work.

“Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.” — Mahatma Gandhi

What you learn you take with you, and it changes both you and the world around you.

“A gem cannot be polished without friction, nor man perfected without trials.” — Chinese Proverb

Proverbs are difficult to beat for advice since they’ve had so much time to be proven wrong already.

“Age is a question of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.” — Satchel Paige

Make up your own mind about what matters. Numbers don’t have to be anything more than numbers.

“An expert is a person who has made all the mistakes that can be made, in a very narrow field.” — Niels Bohr

The expert knows.

“Behind every great achievement is a dreamer of great dreams.” — Robert K. Greenleaf

Nothing is possible that did not first emerge as an idea. Don’t be afraid to pursue something that seems crazy.

“Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep.” — Scott Adams

Art might be taking risks to know what mistakes to keep.

“Don’t find fault. Find a remedy.” — Henry Ford

Ford certainly followed that motto.

“Do just once what others say you can’t do, and you will never pay attention to their limitations again.” — James R. Cook

When someone says you can’t do it, it’s too easy to let it become real inside your head.

“He who is afraid of a thing gives it power over him.” — Moorish Proverb

Let yourself dream and then accomplish it.

“Hope is the feeling you have that the feeling you have isn’t permanent.” — Jean Kerr

What do you feel today? Tomorrow and every other day will be different, too.

“Adversity has the effect of eliciting talents which, in prosperous circumstance, would have lain dormant.” — Horace

Meeting a challenge is what separates the common person and the famous people who say these things.

“We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.” Oscar Wilde

You’re more likely to end up where you want if you aim there.

“What does not destroy me, makes me stronger.” — Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

That’s why some people are so much stronger than others – they’ve been tested.

“If you tell the truth you don’t have to remember anything.” — Mark Twain

Honesty leaves room for you to tackle bigger challenges and become more successful.

“There is one kind of robber whom the law does not strike at, and who steals what is most precious to men: time.” — Napoleon Bonapart

Never waste time. Choose to spend it doing something that makes you happy, or someone else close to you, but if you can’t wait for things and always skip ahead you will miss things.

“The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one that heralds the most discoveries, is not ‘Eureka!’ (I found it!) but ‘That’s funny…’” — Isaac Asimov

It also spawns stories in Asimov’s case.

“I haven’t failed; I’ve found 10,000 ways that don’t work.” — Ben Franklin

That’s perseverance. Keeping track of the failures and not losing the vision of the idea is amazing.

“History is the version of past events that people have decided to agree upon.” — Napoleon Bonaparte

History has a lot to say about what’s happened, and it’s good to remember that it may have been edited. It doesn’t matter if it might be unbelievable; if you believe you can do it, it’s much more likely to happen.

“Don’t say you don’t have enough time. You have exactly the same number of hours per day that were given to Helen Keller, Pasteur, Michelangelo, Mother Teresa, Leonardo da Vinci, Thomas Jefferson, and Albert Einstein.” — H. Jackson Brown

And the same number of hours as everyone else quoted on this list, too.

Next time you wonder what you’re capable of, believe you can be successful. Determination will take you farther than daydreaming. Success may be relative, but it’s worth undertaking. Give yourself permission to take risks for art, dreams, or ideas. You can find more quotations here.

This post was originally published, in a somewhat different form, on Funny Quotes about Life, in 2009.

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It’s not just one thing that makes life good, it’s the accumulation of the small things, the quiet things, the natural things. Crowfoot asks, “What is life? It is the flash of a firefly in the night. It is the breath of a buffalo in the wintertime. It is the little shadow which runs across the grass and loses itself in the sunset.” (1890, as quoted in Catch the Whisper of the Wind.)

Samuel Taylor Coleridge agrees. He said:

“The happiness of life is made up of minute fractions — the little, soon forgotten charities of a kiss or smile, a kind look, a heartfelt compliment, and the countless infinitesimals of pleasurable and genial feeling.”

William Wordsworth also had a word on the subject:

“The best portion of a good man’s life is the little, nameless, unremembered acts of kindness and love.”

We can make someone else’s life better when we remember to follow that Golden Rule, treating others the way we like to be treated. The benevolence of others to us in a smile, a cheerful attitude, or a gentle word is long remembered and treasured in the heart, to be pulled out and cherished again and again. They may soon forget what they said or did, but we value their kindness forever.

As George Washington Carver wisely put it:

“How far you go in life depends on your being tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving, and tolerant of the weak and strong. Because someday in your life you will have been all of these.”

A last word on doing good being an essential component of the good life comes from John Wesley:

“Do all the good you can, by all the means you can, in all the ways you can, in all the places you can, at all the times you can, to all the people you can, as long as ever you can.”

It is not wealth or fame, or leisure, which makes a man happy and makes life good. In every life—no matter how banal, how boring, or how lackluster we feel that our life is—we still have glorious sunsets, ethereal rainbows, the sweet curving cheeks of little children, their chubby fingers lovingly patting mud pies, the flash of a butterfly’s wings, or the trill of a bluebird’s song. Beauty and goodness is out there, just waiting to be seen, heard and felt.

Nikos Kazantzakis equates these simple things of life with happiness when he says:

“How simple and frugal a thing is happiness: a glass of wine, a roast chestnut, a wretched little brazier, the sound of the sea. All that is required to feel that here and now is happiness is a simple, frugal heart.”

Who of us has not felt happiness and contentment while experiencing these small joys? Matthew Arnold said:

“Is it so small a thing, To have enjoy’d the sun, To have lived light in the spring, To have loved, to have thought, to have done…”

In the doing is goodness and pleasure, too. Thomas Jefferson, a man who contributed much to his world and to ours, understood the integrity and delight of work. He was a prodigious thinker and an innovative farmer who enjoyed life. He was of the opinion that:

“It is neither wealth nor splendor, but tranquility and occupation, which give happiness.”

Mark Twain concurred when he said that:

“Work and play are words used to describe the same thing under differing conditions.”

The work that we do should bring us pleasure, and a feeling of contributing to the society in which we live. Whether it’s the joy of performing music or creating art, the pleasure that a manager feels in organizing the myriad details of a business, or the satisfaction that a teacher feels when children’s faces light with understanding of a new concept, our work should be a source of happiness and fulfillment in our lives. Life is not good if our work is not pleasing to our inner being.

One of my favorite writers, Robert Louis Stevenson, had a word to say about work and life, too.

“The best things in life are nearest: Breath in your nostrils, light in your eyes, flowers at your feet, duties at your hand, the path of right just before you. Then do not grasp at the stars, but do life’s plain, common work as it comes, certain that daily duties and daily bread are the sweetest things in life.”

I like Grandma Moses take on life:

“Life is what you make of it. Always has been, always will be.”

Whether life brings us riches or poverty, we still have the choice in ourselves to whine, snivel and complain, or to face up to it, and make the best of it. Martha Washington nailed it when she said:

“I am still determined to be cheerful and happy, in whatever situation I may be; for I have also learned from experience that the greater part of our happiness or misery depends upon our dispositions, and not upon our circumstances.”

She may have been learning from St. Paul, who said in Philippians 4:11

“For I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances.”

Henry Van Dyke also wrote:

“Be glad of life because it gives you the chance to love, to work, to play, and to look up at the stars.”

Life is precious, and there is so much good in it that we must be glad. Agatha Christie said:

”I like living. I have sometimes been wildly, despairingly, acutely miserable, racked with sorrow, but through it all I still know quite certainly that just to be alive is a grand thing.”

Mark Twain looked at life with an unclouded eye. He saw both the good and the bad, but he loved life, and packed a lot of experience into his. This is sage advice from him for living a good life.

“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.”

Take a chance on doing something new, especially if your job feels like drudgery, and it’s not work that fills you with joy or satisfaction.

For most of us a vital element of the good life is love, both the giving and receiving. Oscar Wilde had this to say:

“Keep love in your heart. A life without it is like a sunless garden when the flowers are dead. The consciousness of loving and being loved brings a warmth and richness to life that nothing else can bring.”

Let’s end our discussion on “Life is good” with a favorite quote from that great humorist and philosopher Mark Twain.

“Let us so live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.”

This post was originally published, in a somewhat different form, on Funny Quotes about Life, in 2009.

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Many of these quotations also serve to remind us that achieving our dreams is a possibility within our reach.

“You may have a fresh start any moment you choose, for this thing we call ‘failure’ is not the falling down, but the staying down.” — Mary Pickford

This is a sentiment that is frequently forgotten in our lives. It’s so easy to believe that once you’ve fallen, you’ve failed. In reality, as long as you keep trying, you are always successful.

“There are some people who live in a dream world, and there are some who face reality; and then there are those who turn one into the other.” — Douglas Everett

It’s easy to criticize wild ideas as impossible and promptly dismiss them, but those who make their dreams a reality are some of the most successful people in the world. The internet seemed like something from a dream world, but here we are now using it everyday.

“Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.” — Dr. Seuss

This is an important point that is easily forgotten, the people in our lives who judge us are the ones who don’t matter. The people worth surrounding ourselves with will not judge us for who we are and will even love us for it.

“You’ve got to fight against the urge to try to say and do what other people want of you. That’s not how you earn their respect. They will most respect you for thinking and doing what they didn’t think or what they didn’t dare.” — Unknown

So frequently we play things safe by saying and doing the things we believe other people will approve it. In reality, it is much easier to earn respect with original ideas and integrity.

“The dreamers are the saviors of the world.” — James Allen

If people stopped dreaming, people would stop advancing. There would be no solutions to problems, no new inventions, and nothing beautiful to fill our world with.

“It is never too late to be what you might have been.” — George Eliot

This is an important sentiment, especially for those of us who feel too old to accomplish our dreams. It is easy to believe that our dreams can only be accomplished in our youth. The truth is, our dreams can be achieved at any point in our life if we just take the time to shoot for them.

“Remember that everyone you meet is afraid of something, loves something, and has lost something.” — H. Jackson Brown Jr.

It’s easy to forget about the humanity of the people in our lives. We get caught up in the hustle and bustle of our daily lives and ignore the needs, desires, and pains of those around us. Sometimes we even behave rudely to people who we know nothing about.

“The true measure of an individual is how he treats a person who can do him absolutely no good.” — Ann Landers

This is a lovely sentiment. It’s easy to be kind to those who do good things for us. It’s easy to love those who buy us presents, give us jobs, or help us move through life. It is much more difficult to treat those who do us no good with love and respect, despite the fact that they are no less deserving of it.

“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” — Mark Twain

Instead of playing it safe, we will have much more fulfilling lives if we go out and do things. If we’ve always wanted to learn a new language, play an instrument, or travel, we had better go out and do those things now. In old age, it will be the things we never did that we will feel sad about.

“You win some, you lose some, and some get rained out, but you gotta suit up for them all.” — J. Askenberg

No matter whether we succeed or fail, it’s important that we fully prepare and give every opportunity all the effort that we have. It’s easy to not put in our full effort for things we don’t feel confident about, but we must persevere even in situations where we may not succeed.

“Persistent people begin their success where others end in failure.” — Edward Eggleston

Instead of giving up when we fail, we must keep going. If we remain persistent, we will find a way to make our dreams come true. Almost anything is possible if we never give up.

“Do more than belong, participate. Do more than care, help. Do more than believe, practice. Do more than be fair, be kind. Do more than forgive, forget. Do more than dream, work.” — William Arthur Ward

Intentions are wonderful, but they do not lead us to a better life. In order to accomplish things, we must do something.

“A professional is someone who can do his best when he doesn’t feel like it.” — Alistar Cooke

It’s easy to give up or withhold our best efforts when we don’t feel motivated. Sometimes it’s just the stress of life that prevents us from doing the things we should. It’s important to remember that we must complete all projects with our best effort, even when these projects occur at times when we don’t feel like trying.

“When you do more than you’re paid to do, you will eventually be paid more for what you do.” — Unknown

Frequently we withhold our best efforts because we feel that we aren’t being adequately paid for our work. If we strive to do our best in all situations, our work will someday be appreciated which will result in the increased payment we desire. No one gets a raise from doing mediocre work.

“Better to strengthen your back than lighten your load. The way to get started is to quit talking and begin doing.” — Walt Disney

Complaining is easier than doing work. Instead of focusing on how difficult our work load is, we will make much more progress by beginning to chip away at the load. We must learn to hold the load we’ve been given and strive towards our best.

“If it’s a good idea, go ahead and do it. It is much easier to apologize than it is to get permission.” — Grace M. Hopper

So often, we do not follow our instincts because we fear someone will not approve. Instead of waiting for approval, we must simply go out and do the things we want to do. If our ideas are excellent we will be rewarded for our integrity and if they fail, we can always apologize and hope for better luck in the future.

“A window of opportunity won’t open itself.” — Dave Weinbaum

It’s easy to sit back and wait for opportunities to arise, but those who go out looking for opportunity will find success much faster. We must be active players in our lives, finding opportunities wherever we can.

“Decide what it is you want to do in life, then act as if it’s impossible to fail.” — Joyce Groote

Our doubts have a way of preventing us from following our dreams. If there is something we want from life, we must go out and try to grab it. Instead of dismissing our dreams as impossible, we must act like there’s no such thing as impossibility.

This post was originally published, in a somewhat different form, on Funny Quotes about Life, in 2009.

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If a dose of humor can be added to the mix, to make the truths more memorable or palatable, it is all the better. Such quotes can put a smile on our face and a spring in our step throughout the day, and help us to deal with the inevitable hurdles and pitfalls that we encounter.

In this collection of quotes, our aim is to supply you with quips that will motivate you maintain a positive attitude while striving to achieve your very best.

John Capozzi will keep you working hard today with his reminder that:

“A free lunch is only found in mousetraps.”

Sometimes things do come easy, but an unknown author says it well:

“Luck is a by-product of hard work almost every time.”

Another unknown winner chimes in with:

“Luck is what you have left over after you give 100 percent!”

Along the way you’ll find it’s difficult to take short cuts to success, as Joe Girard points out:

“The elevator to success is out of order. You’ll have to use the stairs… one step at a time.”

Vidal Sassoon, the legendary head of the hair care products empires is in full agreement when he quips:

“The only place where success comes before work is in the dictionary.”

The success he achieved after starting out with nothing can inspire us to keep the goal in mind and take a clearly defined, bold step toward it every day.

It won’t be easy, but the difficulty is exactly what separates those who persevere and succeed for those who do not, for as Noelie Alito comments:

“The shortest distance between two points is under construction.”

Those who fight through, or take the long way around, are often the ones who reach the destination of success in the end!

Along the way, as others or circumstances try to knock you off your charger, keep moving forward. Believe in yourself! Doug Larson encourages us keep pushing to succeed, despite circumstances!

“Some of the world’s greatest feats were accomplished by people not smart enough to know they were impossible.”

American humorist and author Mark Twain put it this way:

“All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure.”

Never consider yourself insignificant! Remember that:

“If you think you are too small to be effective, you have never been in the dark with a mosquito.”

That unknown fount of wisdom encourages us to keep striving – we’ll get noticed eventually!

If it takes you awhile to find your way to success, keep looking for the right path for you, and be inspired by the great J. R. R. Tolkien, who said famously that:

“All who wander are not lost.”

You’ll soon discover your special trail head that leads to the success you’ve worked so hard to realize. And keep moving, putting one foot in front of the other, even when the going gets tough, as famous humorist Will Rogers says:

“Even if you are on the right track, you will get run over if you just sit there.”

If others tell you are too young to succeed, ignore them. according to Billie Burke:

”Age is of no importance unless you’re a cheese”

If others tell you you’re too old to succeed, respond the way Bernard M. Baruch always did:

“To me old age is 15 years older than I am.”

For no matter your age, you have something important to be involved in, a goal or accomplishment that is uniquely yours to achieve. Richard Bach keeps us motivated to skip the rocking chair and keep making a difference in the world as long as we can:

“Here is a test to find whether your mission on earth is finished: If you’re alive it isn’t.”

On your journey toward personal and professional success, remember the resources inherent within yourself. Brian Tracy reminds you that:

“Today the greatest single source of wealth is between your ears.”

Use that brain and success will follow. Avoid the humorous warning left by Bertrand Russell:

“Most people would rather die than think; in fact, they do so.”

Maintain a positive attitude, avoiding “Stinking Thinking” like Montaigne admits succumbing to when he says:

“My life has been filled with terrible misfortune; most of which never happened.”

Keep seeking quotes, books, movies, and people who will inspire you, as Zig Ziglar suggests when he strikes a chord with:

“People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing-that’s why we recommend it daily.”

Stick to your goals and you won’t fall short of success. J.C. Penney prods us in that direction by quipping:

“Give me a stock clerk with a goal and I’ll give you a man who will make history. Give me a man with no goals and I’ll give you a stock clerk.”

Keep laughing, including the ability to laugh at yourself! Keep striving to reach your full potential. Continue to stay focused on your goals, and a lifetime of success, fulfillment and fun will be sure to follow!

For more motivation and positivity, visit some of the following sites:

• Chicken Soup for the Soul
• Stephen Covey
• Tony Robbins

This post was originally published, in a somewhat different form, on Funny Quotes about Life, in 2009.

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“Life is simple, its just not easy.”
– Author Unknown

It’s so easy for us to overcomplicate life, but in reality, we all know that life is not nearly as difficult as we make it. Life is not easy, but it’s also not complicated.

“In spite of the cost of living, it’s still popular.” — Kathy Norris

Living is the most difficult experience imaginable. We love, we lose, we laugh, we cry, and we try our best and still meet failures. It’s still popular because in all its craziness, it still holds immense value.

“Life is like a blanket too short. You pull it up and your toes rebel, you yank it down and shivers meander about your shoulder; but cheerful folks manage to draw their knees up and pass a very comfortable night.”
– Marion Howard

This is a wonderful quote about how life is only as difficult as we make it. Solutions are as simple as tucking our legs up and falling asleep, but if we adopt negative attitudes life becomes much more difficult and depressing.

“Life is like a coin. You can spend it any way you wish, but you only spend it once.” — Lillian Dickson

It’s important that we spend our lives in the way that we would love the most. We only get one life, so we had better do the best with it that we can.

“I think everybody should get rich and famous and do everything they ever dreamed of so they can see that it’s not the answer.”
– Jim Carrey

It’s easy to believe that obtaining fame and fortune will make us happy, but it’s important that we understand the value in life is in people and experiences. Instead of focusing on being popular, we should focus on being the best person we can be and solving our problems as best we can.

“To live remains an art which everyone must learn, and which no one can teach.” — Havelock Ellis

The only way to learn how to live is to simply live. Our experiences are what shape our understanding of life, if we don’t have them, than we won’t know how to live.

“Challenges are what make life interesting. Overcoming them is what makes life meaningful.” — Joshua J. Marine

We need to learn to take pride in our accomplishments. Our life is meaningful when we solve problems, that is what gives us purpose and personal pride.

“Life is a process of becoming, a combination of states we have to go through. Where people fail is that they wish to elect a state and remain in it. This is a kind of death.” — Anais Nin

Life is not stagnant. We must learn to embrace the changes we will go through and realize that life is change.

“There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.” — Albert Einstein

It’s easy to go through our lives without taking the time to appreciate the small things. If we take the time to look around and experience the beauty and amazement that is all around us, we will be opened up to a whole new way of living.

“Our life is what our thoughts make it.” — Marcus Aurelius

The way we think about life shapes the way we understand it. This is an important lesson. Those who think positively, feel positively about their life.

“The best use of life is to invest it in something which will out last life.” — William James

It’s important to leave something behind after we’re gone. This doesn’t mean that we all have to be rich and famous. We can leave an imprint on the world by being kind to the people around us and by being remembered fondly.

“Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.” — George Bernard Shaw

We can be whoever we want to be. It’s easy to think that someday we’ll find out who we are, but the truth is, we shape our own personalities. It’s important that we choose to be the best person that we can be.

“A successful life is one that is lived through understanding and pursuing one’s own path, not chasing after the dreams of others.” — Chin Ning Chu

The dreams of others can look desirable, but it’s important that we look within ourselves to determine what is truly valuable. We need to spend our lives following the dreams that our truly ours and not the dreams that other people tell us our valid.

“And in the end, it’s not the years in your life that count. It’s the life in your years.” — Abraham Lincoln

No matter how long or short our lives are, the most important thing is that we live them to the fullest.

“I like living. I have sometimes been wildly, despairingly, acutely miserable, racked with sorrow, but through it all I still know quite certainly that just to be alive is a grand thing.” — Agatha Christie

Sometimes in challenging times, we forget the value of living. In order to be strong we need to be able to look at the world and be glad that we live in it. This is true even when the only thing to be glad about is that we’re simply alive.

“People living deeply have no fear of death.”
– Anais Nin

Those who are afraid of death are those who haven’t lived their life to the fullest. It’s important that we live in such a way that we are prepared for death at any point. This can only be achieved by being proud of who we are and what we’ve accomplished.

“There are as many nights as days, and the one is just as long as the other in the year’s course. Even a happy life cannot be without a measure of darkness, and the word ‘happy’ would lose its meaning if it were not balanced by sadness.” — Carl Jung

In order to truly understand what it means to be happy, we have to experience what it means to be sad. Instead of dwelling on the bad times, we all need to remember that bad times will inevitably make the good times even better.

“Be glad of life because it gives you the chance to love, to work, to play, and to look up at the stars.” –Henry Van Dyke

Sometimes the only thing we have in life is just life itself. It’s important to love the act of living and everything it encompasses.

“There was never yet an uninteresting life. Such a thing is an impossibility. Inside of the dullest exterior there is a drama, a comedy and a tragedy.” — Mark Twain

It’s easy to feel that our lives are uninteresting, but every person has a story. This is equally applicable to those we come in contact with throughout our lives. We must never consider another person to be boring, because every life is valuable and intriguing.

This post was originally published in 2009 on the now-defunct website, Funny Quotes about Life.

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I took a speed-reading course and read War and Peace in twenty minutes.
It involves Russia.

I’d call him a sadistic, hippophilic necrophile, but that would be
beating a dead horse.

I’m such a good lover because I practice a lot on my own.

Woody Allen Quotes on Relationships

Basically my wife was immature. I’d be at home in the bath and she’d come
in and sink my boats.

I don’t have to ‘freedom-kiss’ my wife when what I really want to do is
French-kiss her.

I tended to place my wife under a pedestal.

In my house I’m the boss, my wife is just the decision maker.

Marriage is the death of hope.

Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as far as meaningless
experiences go its pretty damn good.

I want to tell you a terrific story about oral contraception. I asked
this girl to sleep with me and she said ‘No.’

Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday
night.

Woody Allen on Life

Life is divided into the horrible and the miserable.

Life doesn’t imitate art, it imitates bad television.

My one regret in life is that I am not someone else.

Seventy percent of success in life is showing up.

Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering – and it’s all over
much too soon.

Woody Allen Quotes on Death

I am not afraid of death, I just don’t want to be there when it happens.

Eternal nothingness is fine if you happen to be dressed for it.

I don’t believe in the after life, although I am bringing a change of
underwear.

On the plus side, death is one of the few things that can be done as
easily lying down.

I don’t want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it
through not dying.

It is impossible to experience one’s death objectively and still carry a
tune.

There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening
with an insurance salesman?

Time is nature’s way of keeping everything from happening at once.

Why are our days numbered and not, say, lettered?

You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you
want to live to be a hundred.

Woody Allen on God

If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in
my name at a Swiss bank.

If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans.

As the poet said, ‘Only God can make a tree,’ probably because it’s so
hard to figure out how to get the bark on.

Not only is there no God, but try finding a plumber on Sunday.

To you I’m an atheist; to God, I’m the Loyal Opposition.

Woody Allen Philosophy Quotes

Eighty percent of success is showing up.

I am two with nature.

I believe there is something out there watching us. Unfortunately, it’s
the government.

I think being funny is not anyone’s first choice.

If you’re not failing every now and again, it’s a sign you’re not doing
anything very innovative.

My luck is getting worse and worse. Last night, for instance, I was
mugged by a quaker.

The lion and the calf shall lie down together but the calf won’t get much
sleep.

Comedy just pokes at problems, rarely confronts them squarely. Drama is
like a plate of meat and potatoes, comedy is rather the dessert, a bit like
meringue.

I’m astounded by people who want to ‘know’ the universe when it’s hard
enough to find your way around Chinatown.

Tradition is the illusion of permanence.

What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I
definitely overpaid for my carpet.

What if nothing exists and we’re all in somebody’s dream?

Woody Allen on His Own Inadequacy

I failed to make the chess team because of my height.

I have bad reflexes. I was once run over by a car being pushed by two
guys.

I’ve never been an intellectual but I have this look.

Woody Allen Quotes on Education

I had a terrible education. I attended a school for emotionally disturbed
teachers.

Harvard makes mistakes too, you know. Kissinger taught there.

His lack of education is more than compensated for by his keenly
developed moral bankruptcy.

Students achieving Oneness will move on to Twoness.

Woody Allen Quotes on Joy and Happiness

The talent for being happy is appreciating and liking what you have,
instead of what you don’t have.

I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose.

It seemed the world was divided into good and bad people. The good ones
slept better while the bad ones seemed to enjoy the waking hours much more.

When we played softball, I’d steal second base, feel guilty and go back.

Man consists of two parts, his mind and his body, only the body has more
fun.

Most of the time I don’t have much fun. The rest of the time I don’t have
any fun at all.

Woody Allen Quotes about Family

I’m very proud of my gold pocket watch. My grandfather, on his deathbed,
sold me this watch.

I don’t think my parents liked me. They put a live teddy bear in my crib.

When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my
room.

Woody Allen Quotes about Food

The food here is terrible, and the portions are too small.

I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick. Not wounded. Dead.

Who bothers to cook TV dinners? I suck them frozen.

Thought: Why does man kill? He kills for food. And not only food:
frequently there must be a beverage.

Woody Allen Quotes about Money

Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.

Organized crime in America takes in over forty billion dollars a year and
spends very little on office supplies.

Right now it’s only a notion, but I think I can get the money to make it
into a concept, and later turn it into an idea.

Woody Allen Quotes about Hollywood

If my films don’t show a profit, I know I’m doing something right.

If my films make one more person miserable, I’ll feel I have done my job.

In Beverly Hills, they don’t throw their garbage away. They make it into
television shows.

More Great Woody Allen Quotes

He was so depressed, he tried to commit suicide by inhaling next to an
Armenian.

I ran into Isosceles. He had a great idea for a new triangle!

Some guy hit my fender, and I told him, ‘Be fruitful and multiply,’ but
not in those words.

I was nauseous and tingly all over. I was either in love or I had
smallpox.

This post was originally published, in slightly different form, at the Funny Quotes about Life website, in 2009.

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